How Dr. Abiola Salami’s Coaching Transformed Halima From Aggressive Manager to Trusted Partner
Halima sat in her corner office, the Lagos skyline stretching out before her. It was her 5th year anniversary as Partner at one of the world’s largest consulting firms—a moment she had worked tirelessly for. But as she leaned back in her chair, reflecting on her journey, she remembered a time when this position seemed impossible.
A few years ago, Halima was a brilliant but struggling Manager. She had mastered the technical side of consulting, delivering impeccable financial models and operational strategies. Yet, something was holding her back. Feedback from colleagues and clients was consistent: “Halima is aggressive,” “She doesn’t listen,” “She lacks emotional intelligence.” These comments stung, but they were real.
Her career was at a crossroads. Despite her undeniable potential, she risked stagnation unless she could transform not just her skills, but her leadership presence. That’s when Halima onboarded to Dr. Abiola Salami’s Executive Coaching Program.
Through a meticulously structured approach, I helped Halima evolve from an aggressive and feared Manager into a confident, respected, and inspirational leader. I will share some of the transformative strategies we adopted to propelled Halima to the top and can help any high-potential female leader achieve similar success.
1. Mastering Emotional Intelligence (EI) for Impactful Leadership
One of the first and most critical steps in Halima’s transformation was building her emotional intelligence (EI). Studies show that 90% of top performers have high EI, a skill set that includes self-awareness, self-regulation, motivation, empathy, and social skills.
Halima was highly skilled but lacked the ability to regulate her emotions and understand others. Her sharp and critical feedback often alienated her team, leading to high attrition rates. She needed to build emotional intelligence to foster better relationships and lead with empathy.
We began by leveraging The Magic of Emotional IntelligenceTM Assessment Tool to conduct an EI assessment. We used real-time feedback loops to analyse her after meetings interactions and the Pause-Reflect-Respond Technique, which helped her control emotional reactions and improve engagement.
Over time, Halima became more approachable, improving team morale and reducing turnover. Colleagues started seeking her input rather than avoiding her. Her ability to manage emotions increased her effectiveness in high-stakes situations.
2. Transforming Aggressiveness into Assertive Leadership
Halima’s aggressive approach stemmed from a belief that strong leadership required dominance. However, her confrontational style created resistance rather than results. She needed to transition to an assertive yet collaborative leadership style.
We introduced to her the Empathy Sandwich technique: Start with appreciation, deliver constructive feedback, and end with support. We role-played difficult conversations to refine her approach and practiced powerful yet respectful body language.
Over time, she gained the trust of her team, making them more engaged and productive. Feedback sessions became more effective, fostering collaboration rather than conflict. Clients and colleagues saw her as a leader who could drive results without intimidation.
3. Adopting Executive Presence
Halima’s technical expertise was unquestionable, but she lacked the presence and poise that commanded attention in executive meetings. Her fast-paced speech and defensive tone often undermined her authority. Executive presence is about commanding attention, exuding confidence, and inspiring others. Many high-potential women struggle with this, feeling the need to prove themselves constantly.
Leveraging insights from The Magic of Productive CommunicationTM, we worked on Halima’s communication clarity—no more rushed, defensive responses. She developed a signature leadership style that combined authority with warmth. I taught her strategic silence—the power of pausing before speaking.
As a result, Halima became someone her colleagues looked up to rather than feared.She became a respected voice, trusted by leadership and her team alike. Her consistent and transparent communication increased credibility. Clients felt more secure in her leadership, leading to deeper long-term relationships.
4. Building a Personal Brand of Trust and Reliability
Despite her competence, Halima struggled with building trust due to inconsistent messaging and a perceived lack of approachability. A leader’s reputation is their most valuable currency She needed to craft a personal brand that positioned her as a trustworthy, approachable, and strategic leader.
Therefore, we created a personal leadership vision statement for her, increase her visibility by strategically contributing to industry panels (including speaking at The Peak Performer Festival) and ensured she maintains integrity through values-aligned decision-making.
Halima became a respected voice, trusted by leadership and her team alike. Her consistent and transparent communication increased credibility. Clients felt more secure in her leadership, leading to deeper long-term relationships.
5. The Power of Active Listening and Engagement
Previously, Halima listened to respond rather than to understand. Her tendency to interrupt and push her own perspective alienated both clients and colleagues. Learning to listen actively was a game-changer. She frequently dismissed team feedback without fully considering alternative perspectives, which led to frustration and disengagement. During critical client negotiations, her failure to acknowledge concerns often escalated tensions instead of resolving them.
I coached her to practice the “Mirror and Label” technique: repeating and acknowledging others’ concerns before responding. She used structured 1:1 meetings to deepen relationships and focused on non-verbal cues to demonstrate engagement.
Based on this, her team felt heard and valued, leading to higher morale and collaboration. Conversations became more productive, as team members felt safe sharing their insights. Clients appreciated her newfound patience and willingness to consider diverse perspectives.
6. Leading with Empathy and Compassion
Halima had built a reputation for being results-driven but emotionally distant. Her ability to drive efficiency was unquestioned, but her lack of empathy created disengagement. She needed to connect on a human level with her team and clients. Empathy is a leadership superpower. Leaders who lead with empathy increase employee engagement by 40% (Forbes, 2022).
Halima was introduced to empathy mapping to help her understand colleagues’ perspectives. She was coached to use storytelling tehcniques to connect on a human level. I supported her to practice vulnerability in leadership.
Her relationships improved significantly, making her a more effective leader. Employees became more motivated, feeling valued rather than just managed. Clients responded positively, deepening trust and increasing retention.
7. Strengthening Decision-Making Under Pressure
Even at Partner level, I continue to coach Halima. In her 2nd year as Partner, Halima was tasked with leading a multi-million-dollar client engagement facing severe regulatory challenges. The client’s leadership was on edge, and tensions were high. A single misstep could have resulted in the loss of the client and reputational damage for the firm. Halima had to navigate complex financial models, regulatory compliance, and stakeholder expectations—all under extreme pressure.
I coached Halima to make a high-stake decisions with confidence by using the 80/20 rule to prioritize decisions efficiently. We developed a decision-making framework based on risk assessment and alignment with the firm’s goals. I also taught her crisis leadership techniques.
With her newly developed strategic mindset, Halima confidently presented a risk-mitigation plan that reassured the client and preserved the multi-million-dollar deal. She became a trusted decision-maker, sought after for strategic input.
8. Developing Executive-Level Communication Skills
During her Manager days, Halima often found herself struggling to communicate effectively with senior executives, especially in high-pressure meetings. Her tendency to be overly technical and defensive made it difficult for her to persuade key stakeholders. She needed to refine her approach to convey her insights with clarity and impact.
One defining moment occurred during a major pitch to a prospective client. Her explanations were sound, but her delivery was rigid, and she failed to engage her audience. The firm lost the bid to a competitor with a more compelling presentation. This experience was a wake-up call, pushing her to elevate her communication skills.
I made Halima realise that High-level executives communicate with clarity, brevity, and persuasion. So, I coached her to practice the “CEO Method”: Clear, Engaging, and Outcome-Driven. I also helped her eliminate filler words and defensive speech patterns while strengthening her storytelling abilities.
She became more persuasive, influencing stakeholders effectively. She gained the confidence to deliver impactful messages that resonated with executives. Her ability to articulate strategic insights positioned her as a go-to leader in critical discussions. Ultimately, her refined communication helped win key client engagements and strengthened her firm’s market positioning.
9. Mastering the Art of Influence and Strategic Networking
Before her transformation, Halima struggled with building influential relationships within and outside her organization. She was known for her technical expertise but lacked the ability to leverage relationships for career and business growth. She often hesitated to initiate conversations with senior leaders and industry peers, missing out on valuable opportunities.
The turning point came when she was overlooked for a high-profile industry panel. Despite her qualifications, she had not actively positioned herself as a thought leader. She realized that influence and networking were as critical as technical competence.
I made Halima realise that Influence is not about power—it’s about persuasion and relationship-building. I worked with her to create a strategic networking plan to connect with key industry players. I trained her on influencing without authority techniques and coached her to enhanced her boardroom presence with cultural and emotional intelligence.
As a result, Halima expanded her influence both internally and externally. She secured invitations to high-profile industry events and began forming strategic alliances. Her network became a powerful asset, opening doors to lucrative client deals. Over time, she established herself as a key influencer in her field, strengthening her leadership brand.
10. Cultivating Resilience and Self-Leadership
Leadership is a journey filled with challenges, and Halima faced her share of setbacks. Early in her career, she struggled with managing stress and setbacks, often taking failures personally. The pressure of leadership led to burnout, and she began doubting her capabilities.
Her turning point came when a major project she led fell apart due to unforeseen regulatory changes. The failure shook her confidence, but instead of succumbing to self-doubt, she sought to build resilience. She realized that true leadership required the ability to recover quickly and adapt in the face of adversity.
I coached Halima to realise that success requires mental toughness and adaptability. We implemented stress management and mindfulness techniques. Coached her to foster a growth mindset by reframing failures as learning opportunities. We made self-care and sustainable productivity practices top priority.
Halima now handles challenges with grace and grit. She learned to view obstacles as opportunities for growth rather than setbacks. Her ability to stay composed under pressure increased her credibility among peers and executives. As a result, she became known as a leader who could navigate crises with confidence and strategic foresight.
Conclusion: The Journey from Good to Great
Halima’s transformation is proof that leadership is not just about skills but also about self-awareness, emotional intelligence, and influence. If you’re a high-potential female executive or entrepreneur, applying these 10 strategies can be your roadmap to exponential career growth.
Are you ready to take your leadership to the next level? Contact us today on +2347026668008 or hello@abiolachamp.com
About Dr. Abiola Salami
Dr. Abiola Salami is the Convener of Dr Abiola Salami International Leadership Bootcamp ; The Peak PerformerTM Festival Made4More Accelerator Program and The New Year Kickoff Summit. He is the Principal Performance Strategist at CHAMP – a full scale professional services firm trusted by high performing business leaders for providing Executive Coaching, Workforce Development & Advisory Services to improve performance. You can reach his team on hello@abiolachamp.com and connect with him @abiolachamp on all social media platforms.
